You hear a lot about lying in relationships; how it’s wrong and that it’s unhealthy to lie to each other. Most likely, you also hear how honesty is the best policy in relationships. Both of these things are true. However, it’s also true that in certain situations, it may be better to opt for a little white lie over brutal, utter and complete honesty.
If you’re saying to yourself right now that it’s just wrong to lie to your partner, consider some of the following scenarios:
- You’ve just started dating a new guy that you like a lot. In fact, things are going so great that you’ve jumped things to the “next level.” During one of those afterglow pillow talk sessions, he suddenly asks you how many men you’ve slept with. This is one of those questions that there’s really no right answer to. Whatever answer you offer is going to just lead to another question. If you’ve slept with so many guys that your list is in triple digits, you’re going to definitely want to tone that down a bit or you’ll end up coming off as less than reputable. Basically, less is better than more in this case.
- You’re a guy that has just slept with his new girlfriend for the first time. She’s aware that you were with another girl for a long time and that she was quite beautiful. Now, this new girl turns to you and says “Do you think I’m as pretty as she is?” Well, she’s not really, and that’s one of the main reasons you started dating her. You’ve found out just how high maintenance beautiful women can be and you don’t want any part of it again. However, your answer is going to be a simple one: “No, you’re not as pretty as she is. You’re much more beautiful than she is.”
- It’s karaoke night at the local bar. Your guy is determined to get up and do a rendition of Don’t You Want Me Baby, performing all parts by himself. The problem is that he’s totally tone deaf and you simply don’t know how to tell him. So he gets up and performs his song, returning to his seat amid whistles, claps and outright guffaws. He totally misunderstands and believes they thought he was great. He turns to you, still flushed from the excitement, and says: “So, I was pretty good, huh, babe?” Don’t even try for the best way to answer this. Just tell him he was awesome and hope he doesn’t think the crowd wants an encore.
- Your girlfriend has just got herself a precious little Chihuahua from the local shelter. She adores little Killer and babies him more than she does you, lately. Killer loves her back fiercely but hates YOU just as fiercely. Your girlfriend never sees Killer trying to bite you or snap at you. Killer is a smart little dog. Your girlfriend has made it clear that you’re going to need to accept Killer or there will be problems. She wants to know what you think of Killer. Your answer is that you adore him.
So now you can see when honesty is simply not the best thing in a relationship.